Funny tv show quotes and sayings.
Yeah, it’s right next to the prostrate…or is that the on switch?
I’m f*cking miserable. I had to get up at 10 o’clock this morning.
I want to die a natural death at the age of 102—like the city of Detroit.
I still hate you, but you have a pretty good collection of nudie magazines.
You knew your pal had come into money when he started throwing out perfectly good pistachios like he was above cracking ‘em open with a box cutter like the rest of us.
That was well brought up. Too bad you weren’t.
Oh I’m stomping the brakes, put that idea right through the fucking windshield.
Well, there’s nothing better than a fart. Except for kids falling off bikes, maybe. Fuck, I could watch kids falling off bikes all day, I don’t give a fuck about your kids.
We only got one shot at this. One chance. One win. You know? Vomit on your mom’s spaghetti, or whatever that talking singer says.
ou stopped toe curlin’ in the hot tub ‘cause you heard sperms stay alive in there and you’ve seen Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles enough times to know how that story ends.
It’s a hard life picking stones and pulin’ teats, but as sure as God’s got sandals, it beats fightin’ dudes with treasure trails.
I see the muscle shirt came today. Muscles coming tomorrow? Did ya get a tracking number? Oh I hope he got a tracking number. That package is going to be smaller than the one you’re sportin’ now.
Tim’s, McDonald’s, and the beer store are all closed on Christmas Day. And that’s your whole world right there.”
Closest you’re gettin’ to any action this weekend is givin’ the dairy cow’s teets a good scrubbin’.
Pitter-patter, let’s get at ‘er.”
Fuck, Lemony Snicket, what A Series of Unfortunate Events you been through, you ugly fuck.
Daryl: You guys do CrossFit? Wayne: You can cross fuck off.
Your dad says guys with big trucks have little dinks. And that makes sense cuz you want a real big truck and got a real little dink.
What’s up with your body hair, you big shoots? You look like a 12-year-old Dutch girl.
If you have a problem with the majestic Canadian Goose, then you have a problem with me. And I suggest you let that one marinate.
Oh, come on, kitten. I won’t tell anyone.
Buddy you couldn’t wheel a fuckin’ tire down a hill.
You wish there was a pied piper for possums. But there isn’t, so you’re just gonna have to keep picking ‘em off with a .22.
Call me a cake, ‘cause I’ll go straight to your ass, cowboy!
If I was a Dr. Seuss book, I’d be The Fat in the Hat.
I wish you weren’t so fucking awkward, bud.
Fuck you Jonesy! Your mom just liked my Instagram post from 2 years ago in Puerto Vallarta. Tell her I’ll put my swim trunks on for her any time she likes.
Here’s a poem. Star light, star bright, why the fuck you got earrings on? Bet your lobes ain’t the only thing that got a hole punched in ’em.
Seeing as this is most certainly a one-off event and not a tradition that also falls on some made-up holiday that I couldn’t give a cats queef about, I’m out. There’s happiness calling my name from the bottom of a bottle of Puppers.
Well, I’d say give your balls a tug, but it looks like yer pants are doin’ it for ya.
You seen a ‘coon havin’ sex with a barn cat on top of your truck? Fuck what’s the nature of that David Suzuki.
You’re made of spare parts, aren’t you, bud?
Does a duck with a boner drag weeds?”
This is why there is a lot of great funny tv show quotes
Do you like funny TV shows? Well, now is the time to start watching them. The Internet is full of resources for viewing your favorite funny TV shows, especially if you want to keep track of the newest releases.
You can find online funny TV shows by typing “unlock”entertainment” into your search engine. In a few seconds, you will have results from where you can order the episodes or choose a TV show and download it.
Now, here’s the thing – if you already watched the funny TV shows that you wanted to watch, and now you can’t find it again, you might not know where to go. You have to look around a bit in order to find a show that’s right for you. Here are some ideas for you.
It’s really easy to have your own television and a whole world of television shows on your couch at the same time. Now, you can choose from everything from reality shows to comedy videos and even adult programs. You’ll never have trouble finding something to keep you entertained.
You don’t have to search all over town for a place to get fun facts, but you will need a source of fun facts. You can find some free funny facts on the Internet, but they won’t always be up to date. That’s why you may want to take advantage of the Internet’s resources for entertainment as well.
Search engines are your friend when it comes to finding interesting entertainment. Just type in the words “funny TV shows” into your search engine and get a list of results. Some of these sites may not be totally free, but some are so entertaining that you won’t even have to pay to enjoy them.
Even when you think you have found the funniest of funny shows, you still have to choose the best one for you. You don’t want to pick a show just because the host was funny. Rather, pick the show because you like the show.
Try to consider some factors when choosing your TV shows. Of course, you want to have a show you can enjoy for a long time. But you also want to have something that you can watch, no matter what time of day or night it is.
Be open-minded about the show you choose. It should be funny and also have something to say. Look for shows that can go with your mood and also for the time of day.
If you go out for dinner or to a movie, remember to keep the TV on. For example, when your car has gotten hot, you can have a nice cold cup of coffee before you turn on the TV to watch the hottest sitcoms that hit the airwaves.
Of course, there’s no reason to wait until your life is all written down before you make some entertainment. Try watching the movies from your DVD’s as well.